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Friday 8 March 2024

ROBERT IN WONDERLAND

In his latest post Robert 'really ripped in to' the NZ Catholic Church, almost calling them  abusers of children ... well, almost. In his editorial on the article he copied and pasted he wondered this:

"I found this on vatican news. I do feel that One news has acted as judge and jury on the ex Cardinal though. We should not tolerate the abuse of children; but let's make certain we are absolutely sure before destroying someone's reputation."
Strong words indeed by someone who before has refused to accept any wrong-doing by the odious Catholic Church. It's small beginnings I guess and, one day, particularly if he undergoes some sort of memory recovery through hypnosis, he might admit that either he was fiddled with or he knows someone who was.

Here's his post:

ROBERT'S 'EXPOSE' OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH

If you read that you would have noticed that the report said 

''An extensive investigation reveals that the Church in New Zealand has received 1,680 reports of abuse against Catholic clergy, men and women religious, and lay people from 1950 to today, with the President of the New Zealand's Bishops describing the findings as “horrifying”.

I wonder what Robert found in that that was ambiguous.

 And this ...

The New Zealand Catholic Church has revealed that 14 percent of its diocesan clergy (nearly one in seven) has been accused of abusing children and adults since 1950.The figures emerge from an extensive research conducted at the request of the Royal Commission on Abuse in Care, which was set up in 2018 by Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern.

... where the Catholic Church itself admitted the abuse.

"But let's make certain we are absolutely sure before destroying someone's reputation." say's Robert.







 

Friday 1 March 2024

LOST IN TRANSLATION




The other bloggers are more frequently using other languages - Italian or Latin in their comments on posts.









In the case of one of them it's understandable since his blog posts read like they are written by someone for whom English is a second language.  Some of his comments are also delusional. See:





The problem is though that meaning is often lost in translation. 

This got me thinking about the nonsense contained in the Bible, the Sola Scriptura and the Catechism. Maybe it's the fact that these were originally penned in archaic and no longer used languages and then translated into various modern languages before finally being translated into English. A lot can go wrong there.

***************

I thought that I'd select three things from the Catechism that make no sense and write them in Italian which may have been close to the originals in Aramaic, Greek and Latin. Here goes:

THE ANNUNCIATION

L'ANNUNCIO

Maria era fidanzata con Giuseppe e attendeva con ansia le nozze. Sfortunatamente prima che ciò accadesse, Maria fece sesso con un arcangelo che la fece rimanere incinta. Maria, imbarazzata, disse a Giuseppe di essere miracolosamente incinta. Giuseppe, non essendo molto intelligente, ci credeva.



THE ASSUMPTION

L'ASSUNZIONE

Quando Maria, la madre del profeta Gesù morì, i seguaci non sapevano cosa dire ai credenti poiché avevano inventato una storia su Gesù che ascende al cielo. Allora ebbero la brillante idea che Gesù, in paradiso, avrebbe trascinato Maria su di sé mediante l'uso di corde e carrucole sotto la copertura dell'oscurità. Non era la più intelligente delle idee ma diciamocelo i credenti non erano proprio dei geni.

THE EUCHARIST

L'EUCARISTIA

Prima che Gesù decidesse di scappare in Gallia con la sua fidanzata Maria Maddalena, appena incinta, organizzò una cena per i suoi amici apostoli. Alla fine propose un brindisi e disse loro: "Ricordatevi di me quando in futuro mangerete pane bianco e berrete vino rosso sangue. Fate questo per me".

***************

Get out your Italian phrase books and see if you can convert these into a sensible language. Hopefully nothing will be lost in translation.

MORE MISTAKES ... SORRY, MYSTICS

Robert the catholic something or other recently 'discovered' another mystic who for some reason, Jesus Christ has chosen to act as a medium for his messages to humanity. I guess that JC doesn't trust the regular news media nor the newish social media networks - and, why should he? These channels have proven themselves to be unreliable at best and outright liars at worst. Sensationalism with or without 'page three tits' is their by-line because basically it sells advertising and invites subscriptions.


Jesus Christ though, and he's old enough to know better, should do some due diligence when choosing mystics as his media to get his messages across. I mean, it's not hard now that we have on-line search engines like Google and a host of others to do some background checks. It only took me a couple of minutes to find out that Luz de María de Bonilla who Robert thinks is the latest 'bees knees' is a fraudster and a scam artist. *

I guess that Robert was swayed by this: NONSENSE  when he should have taken another few seconds of 'research' to find stuff like this: THE REAL DEAL 

Anyway, intrigued by this I did a comprehensive internet search (Google) and discovered a hitherto little known mystic and martyred saint and I'd like to share her story with you.



Imelda Bonifica del Cassandria (1592 - 1631) St. Imelda, hacked to death by children.



Imelda Bonifica was a teacher in Cassandria, Italy, in the early 17th century. Formerly a novice in the Papal Cloister in Rome, she became a schoolmistress after being banished for taking the papal cloister vows too seriously. There were suspicions of cruelty and inappropriate behaviour.  Imelda was a devotee of flagellation and used various items for mortification of her flesh. These include a cilice belt (a belt made of coarse animal hair worn close to the skin), a 'Discipline' ( a scourge having seven tails representing the seven deadly sins and seven virtues for self-flagellation of the back), and various small puncturing devices which she used to replicate Christ's wounds to her feet and hands. Even back in those times this was too much for the normally cruel and repressive Papal Cloister.



In her new role, as a Catholic teacher of near pagan pupils during a period when Catholicism was under attack from not only Protestantism but general atheistic sentiment, Imelda was in a dangerous position. By refusing to accept any of the local populace's criticism of the Roman Catholic Church, she took out her frustrations on her students who she beat mercilessly with canes, rulers and the long leather belt she wore around her waist. The children, influenced by their non-conforming parents refused to accept the 'truth's that Imelda lectured them on drawn from the Catechism. This angered the local officials and parents alike and Imelda was seized and sentenced to death and turned her over to her students as her executioners. Why this should be the case and why they seemed happy to carry out the sentence is not entirely clear from historical accounts, but Imelda's death was torturous because of it: the only instruments the students had at their disposal were small and non-lethal. The boys employed their tablets to bash Imelda and the girls used their styluses (pointed iron instruments for writing) and penknives to make a multitude of cuts and punctures all over her body for an agonisingly extended time. Conscious through the long process, Imelda encouraged them to strike her forcefully, as she was eager to die for her faith. Reports of the time suggested that Imelda enjoyed the experience. Later the Vatican chose to see that this was an entreaty to Jesus and god in heaven to welcome her to her rightful place. 

No doubt Robert will 'adopt' Imelda Bonifica del Cassandria as an example of gaining a place in heaven through enduring "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune". I suggest that he takes the story to share with his Father Magenta at Sunday Church.













* #STOP PRESS# Robert has just admitted that he now knows that Luz de María de Bonilla is a scam artist.








Tuesday 27 February 2024

MUM - HE'S AT IT AGAIN!

 



Robert, as reported in his blog has found another religious nutter - this time a fraudster who goes by the name of Luz de Maria Bonilla (not her real name) who claims that Jesus sends her messages from Heaven.

LUZ DE MARIA IS A FRAUD

Why do Catholics and our own Robert believe in this nonsense?

Why do mystics report messages from Jesus, Mary, God and anyone else from Heaven that were only sent to them via some unreported or unsubstantiated medium?

Why doesn't Heaven have a better communication system that can broadcast public messages?

Confused? I am .... oh, you probably (probability of 1) have never read or even heard of Robert's blog. Sorry about that. Here's a link: ROBERT'S BLOG 

Enjoy!

Wednesday 21 February 2024

SO, ROBERT IS TURNING INTO A PRIEST

 




I've suspected it for a while now but Robert confirmed it in a comment on one of his recent posts:


I didn't realise that it would happen naturally though - there's nothing natural in the Catholic Church. I thought that he would be recruited and join the seminary to undergo some training.

Should the Catholic Church accept him into the fold however they should proceed with caution as some of his ideas are more wacky than most of the god-botherers's views - kind of like Father Dougal:




Wednesday 14 February 2024

LESSER KNOWN MIRACLES PART ONE - THE RAWHITI LETTERBOX MADONNA

Miracles have been the feature topic in the most popular religious blog in this community recently. See:

HERE

HERE and

HERE

Now while miracles have been reported before in New Zealand like the fact that Chris Luxon became prime minister and Robert still believes in mythical deities, most don't get reported or are dismissed as the ravings of loonies.

There were a couple though that got attention back in the 1990s - one in 1993 in Auckland and the other in 1995 near Taumarunui.*

The 1993 apparition happened during the visit to New Zealand of the Medjugorje seer Ivan Dragicevic.
The New Zealandia reported that Dragicevic had a vision of Mary in St Patrick’s Cathedral, before Mass. While this took place, hundreds of people reportedly said they saw the sun (with the shape of a host, Our Lady, the crucifix or a dove) pulsating and spinning, and changing colour. Some people present reportedly said that some or all of the silver parts of their rosary beads had turned to gold. Anecdotal evidence saw a run on rosary bead purchases at the church store and corresponding overwhelming of jewellery and gold bullion trading stores.

The other New Zealand apparition is claimed to have happened at Manu Ariki Marae near Taumarunui in 1995 where the vision of a lady in white happened for nearly three hours at the marae, before slowly fading away.
The community there at the time reportedly had beliefs loosely based on Christianity, but with an emphasis on the female side of God. Catholic Church investigators discovered the remnants of mushroom inspired dishes and a disturbing number of photographs of statues of the virgin Mary taken from low angles. The investigation is on-going.

What this post is about is the unreported Rawhiti Letterbox Madonna, an event that took place in December 1964.
Three children who were dodging school to raid letterboxes, looking for Christmas cards and gifts that often contained money, had a scare when one of the boxes 'spoke' to them. They were discovered cowering and babbling by local constable Bob (Rangi) Eechwai and told him that a letterbox accosted them as they were riding past on their bikes. A few judicious albeit not judicial cuffs around their ears established the fact that they had been illegally checking out letterboxes and the one in particular, the Virgin Mary one, when they opened it screamed out "Shut the fucking door, you're letting a draft in!"


While Constable Bob wasn't exactly a religious guy, he still liked to keep his options open "just in case" he said and marched the kids along to see his second cousin Father Uptharode. His cuzzy was intrigued by the children's story but appalled at what they reported 'Mary' as saying. He coached them into reporting Mary's exclamation as something a little more seemly, or as seemly as the whole Maryan thing could be. He told them to quote Mary as saying:

 “The Holy Spirit came upon me, and the power of the Most High overshadowed me." 
"Eeew!" said the kids and each received a cuff around the ears.


The Catholic Bishop of the Northland diocese wasn't convinced by the story however and, after an investigation showed that an old atheist who was sick of having his mail stolen had rigged up a tape recorder in his mailbox to abuse anyone except the postman, closed the case.
Father Uptharode was relocated to a leper colony in the Solomon Islands and the little episode was buried in the church archives along with reports of kiddie fiddling, selling of communion hosts and misappropriation of the Sunday collections.


I guess we're lucky that we live in New Zealand where most people are rational.















* Richard was not living in Taumarunui at the time having left there in the mid 1970s. He did have visions but these were put down to overindulgence in alcohol.

Wednesday 7 February 2024

HOW WILL I DRESS WHEN I BECOME A SAINT?

 


The above costumes cover a range of saints but are probably more suited to Robert than me. They don't 'float my boat'.
I kind of like the Knight Templar look but, living in Northland I usually go about in shorts and T-shirts so will be looking for something a bit less formal.

Saint Jerome apparently is the patron of irascible, morbidly sensitive, old curmudgeons which pisses me off because that was what I wanted to be. Maybe there's room for the two of us though and we can share the role both doing it part-time.

Jerome normally dresses like this:


Which is more like how Richard dresses than I do but on hot days can sometimes be seen like this:


I might have to work out a bit more on the exercise machines and the weights before I try that look though and would prefer wearing my Swanndri underpants rather than that nappy he's wearing.

Maybe something like this would suit me better:



ROBERT IN WONDERLAND

In his latest post Robert 'really ripped in to' the NZ Catholic Church, almost calling them  abusers of children ... well, almost. I...